Changing the word No to Next – Guest Post from Gretchen Breuner

This week, I am thrilled to have Gretchen Breuner writing a second Guest Blog for us; “Changing the word No to Next”

Rejection sucks. We likely all began dealing with rejection by about the age of two years old. No, you can’t play with that toy. No, you can’t do that at the dinner table. No, you can’t have that piece of candy, again… As we get older that rejection can sound like, No, you can’t be my friend. No, I don’t want to date you. No, I don’t want to marry you. No, I don’t want to hire you…

Rejection can be hard, and since we have all experienced it at some part in our lives, it should get easier, right? Maybe it just gets easier once you have a different mindset – or meaning around it.

Once you can give that rejection a new meaning, and I realize that is not always easy, it does make that No feel less painful. As soon as I changed my language around the word “no” when I was representing my speaker clients for getting more speaking gigs, a lot of things in my business shifted.

I changed No to Next.

This switch was beneficial for many reasons, some of them clearly obvious. But, the best result from changing my language around No took me by surprise.

In business we often hear, “Don’t take it personally, this is just business.” And that’s true, except for when it is personal. “We don’t like you, so we’re not going to hire you.” How does that not feel personal? Same goes for pitching for a speaking gig.

When I started adopting No means Next into my body, every No I got actually became a No to them, not to me! Because, as soon as my mind said, “Next!” I was already passed the “pain” of rejection. Next allowed me to move more quickly, to look at the very Next lead as a viable and exciting opportunity for my client.

No means Next is kinda like the math equation, “A + B does not always = C.” You can feel like you’ve done everything right: your Talent has a great speaker kit, excellent messaging, a solid, audience-serving talk, a fabulous and unique hook, is a perfect fit for this event, and has fantastic social proof – and despite all that effort, you still don’t get to C, that coveted Yes. You still get the No.

I was working with a private client a while back, and I sent out a great pitch. It had everything – he had shared the stage with Barack Obama, Richard Branson, Andre Agassi, Robert Kiyoski and more. Not only did he have a book for sale but also an online training program for $997. This guy closes, on average, 30% of the room, and he often pays for the entire event, just with what he can bring in from sales.

I thought the pitch was a slam-dunk, that my client could land this gig quickly and easily.


I got the “No, thanks,” and was shocked. How could this guy be rejected? How could I be rejected?

We both were. I won’t lie. It’s disappointing to get that No, especially after the hard work you’ve put into researching, prospecting and submitting for that speaking gig.

But, adopting the mantra of No means Next, bouncing back can happen pretty quickly. And the faster you can move down the list of prospects, the faster you can find that next gig, the faster you can get your client, your Talent, on stage and on his or her way to impacting more people.

And when that impact happens, and when your Talent’s business starts to take off because you’ve been behind the scenes, behind that curtain, getting them more gigs, that No will be forgotten. Not only will you have happily moved right onto Next, but your Talent, your client, will also look at you excitedly and say, “YES!”

No rejection could feel better than that kind of YES!

Learn more:  After working with a number of private clients on how to get on stages, Gretchen Breuner figured out that it was the Talent’s support person, or VA, that should be trained on how to find speaking gigs. This way, the Talent could get on stage, and the Team knew just what to do to make that happen. Finally, everyone was happy. By helping many VAs grow their business, stand apart from their competition and make more money, Gretchen knows she can help you too.

When she first started as a speaker, Gretchen spoke nationally and internationally, appeared on San Diego’s TODAY show and other local TV programs, was featured in newspapers and PARENTS magazine and also appeared on KPBS radio.

On 30 May 17 at 8pm (UK)  Gretchen will teach you how offering speaker support to your clients will help you make more money, more easily find and attract new clients, and put you in-demand as a VA.  From what I have seen so far, you will want to register for this call.